In
Eleng’ata Enterit, under massive sycamore trees along a tiny stream, we studied
hygiene, African anthropology, tropical diseases, and medicines to treat them.
We
learned to identify Kenyan coins and bills—and how to calculate the Kenya
Shilling’s equivalent value in U.S. dollars.
But perhaps most importantly, we discovered that what is
polite in one culture could be rude in another.
Our
goal was to learn to live in non-offensive ways among Africans. We needed to
learn to appreciate their culture and traditions and practices.
We
had to learn Africans’ world views and social norms and values and
expectations.
But we
had to go beyond just appreciating their ways of doing things—we needed to respectfully
model our behavior after theirs. We needed to fit in.
We
needed to try really hard
not to offend anyone.
For example, in Kenya we should never use the left hand
to give a person something. The left hand is considered dirty for reasons I won’t
go into here.
Africans are people-oriented. In Kenya, everyone shakes
hands when they say hello and goodbye. If we fail to do so, we offend them.
When Kenyans first greet one another, they take time to
ask about each other’s health, family, and extended family. Only after a
lengthy discussion do they get to business. Many Americans struggle within such
a people-oriented culture because we are goal-oriented—we have work to do.
Kenyans will not look you in the eye, and they wish you
wouldn’t look them in the eye either. They look at your shoulder while they
talk to you, or off in the distance. This is hard to remember because we
Americans usually look people directly in the eye.
And only after I returned to the States did I learn that
a good woman never crosses her legs. Oh, dear, I must have proven hundreds of
times that I am not a good woman!
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| This is a "bum bag," NOT a fanny pack! |
While we lived in Africa, no one spoke the word “p.a.n.t.s”
in mixed company, but it was okay to talk about trousers.
My friend Sue was surprised to learn that the term “f.a.n.n.y
pack” is vulgar in Kenya. No one winces, though, at “bum bag.”
Sue described such cross-cultural training as “relearning
English.”
So, just by reading this, are you feeling—a little. . . a
little disoriented? If so, welcome to cross-cultural living! Adjusting to a new
culture can be unsettling, but. . . .
. . . it can also
be an adventure!
A good sense of humor helps! Dave and I would quickly
learn that we had to laugh at ourselves when we made blunders.
Just for fun, take these quizzes about dining etiquette
in other cultures:
C’mon back next week and I’ll tell you more fun stuff
about cross-cultural living.
If you have a story about cross-cultural adventures
(or “adventures”), let us know.
Leave a comment below
or on the Facebook Page for Grandma’s Letters from Africa,
or send a private message on Messenger.
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